OK - PROMISED TO GET BACK TO YOU on time spent at the wrinkle ranch in Arizona with Mom and Dad the first week in March.  One of the highlights and lowlights of the week was the much acclaimed theater production of The Pearls of Paulene.  Mom is the Stage Manager and her friend Jan is the Writer/Director/Producer.

Paulene and her mother - just two hard working girls trying to make enough money to pay the mortgage.

Of course, this dastardly villain holds the mortgage and has to keep his floozie girlfriend happy - you know the story.

BOO!

The Pawn Shop where Paulene goes to sell her grandmother's pearls to help pay the mortgage.

The Pearls of Wisdom fortune teller (reading Fortunes for Dummies) where Paulene goes to find out who bought her Grandmother's pearls after suffering remorse over selling them.

In search for the pearls she stumbles across Mother of Pearl Oyster Bar where Pearl Jam was performing.

No, sorry - it's Pearl Jelly

The Fastest Dancers in the West were also performing and then it happend  ( I still have not been able to get this song out of my head)

"I plopped down in my easy chair and turned on channel 2.  A bad gunslinger names Salty Sam was chasin poor Sweet Sue.  He trapped her in the old sawmill and said with an evil laugh, If you don't give me the deed to your ranch I'll saw you all in half.

and then he grabbed her

he tied her up

he turned on the bandsaw"

"And then along came Jones

Tall thin Jones

Slow-walkin Jones

Slow-talkin Jones

Along came, long lean, lanky Jones"

Minnie Pearl was there of, course

She asked if there was anyone in the audience who had any special talent they would like to perform -

This guy shows up - straight off the Lettermen show, who catches eggs in his mouth thrown from the audience. Now that's talent (I guess he really was on Lettermen's stupid people tricks).

Anyway, Paulene found her Grandmother's box of pearls - turned out to be her pearly white teeth, the White Knight proposed marriage to save her home from the villain (BOO!) and we all lived happily ever after.  

THE END!

Good Job Mom and Jan! - Can't wait for next year.

Dad - thanks for being my date to the theater.